While my “due date” came and went, I grew more anxious and ready for my sweet baby girl to join us! My midwives kept me upbeat, but because I had been suffering with Symphysis Pubis Dysfunction, I was ready for her to come so I could feel some relief from the discomfort. Monday morning, 10 days post date, I started to have my bloody show and texted my midwife, Tess. She gave me hope relaying this meant we were on the start of something good.
While nothing else happened Monday, I knew I’d be holding my precious girl very soon. Monday night comes, and my husband, Joe, and I went for a walk after dinner. We came back and decided to watch his favorite, Antique Roadshow. Right in the middle of it, I started to have period like cramps and thought “maybe this is something” and turns out it was! At that time it was 7:30p, so I decided to text Tess again and she recommended rest and nutritious food. So we prepared the house a bit (I was still in denial that this might actually be it) showered, and attempted sleep.
We were in bed by 9:30p, but at 10:30p I couldn’t sleep through the contractions, so I timed them and read birth stories in bed. Around 11:30p I tired myself out, and woke again at 12:45a and started pacing the room. I finally woke Joe up, and he ran me a bath while he got on the phone with Tess around 2am. Tess and her supervising midwife, April, decided to head on over. By the time they came over, I was out of the bath and lying on the bed. Tess checked me and turned out I was 4cm, right on the brink of active labor! So, I guess this was real after all!
So Tess & April left me to labor in my bed with Ryan supporting me and things continued to progress. Around 7am I entered the birth pool. It was nice, but not as relaxing as the first time I got in our tub. As contractions intensified, I started to feel a very odd feeling in my hips, it was intense and distracted me from my contractions. I couldn’t get comfortable at all, even with all the positions I tried. Finally, after what we thought was transition, Tess & April suggested I get out and check my progression. We went to the bed and to everyone’s surprise, I was only 6 centimeters!I felt so defeated. Seriously. I sat there with my half glazed eyes wondering if I could make it another 4, pushing her out with the hip pain. Yes, you read that right, contractions didn’t bother me, my hip pain was more consuming than any contraction. I kid you not, if you asked me to labor RIGHT NOW, I’d do it if it meant I didn’t have the odd hip pain my midwife had only seen 3 times in her 16 years of experience.
So back to what’s going on in my head…A complete mental fight. I consider the scenarios in my head, do I stay here at home? Do I go to the hospital? How in the world would I survive a car ride like this? I fought in my head for what seemed like a while, and finally, I just cried out to God. I NEEDED his strength. I remember yelling aloud one of my most desperate prayers, because I really wasn’t sure I’d make it. But I gave into the pain, I remember April saying “fall into the bed, let it go into the bed” and with each passing contraction, and the all consuming hip pain, I gave in knowing each contraction would bring me closer.
Finally around 1:00pm, I was fully effaced and completely dilated, and boy was I ready to push. With each contraction, I prepared for the trifecta: urge to push, contraction, and consuming hip pain. I felt empowered, and a bit primal, but I also knew this was apart of my design. So with each wave, I knew what the end goal was, and that was sweet victory for sure. Finally, while pushing on my side, my midwives suggested I move to the birthing stool to assist my pushing, and I obliged. In this position I could feel even more movement, but it was such a new feeling. Before I knew it, Tess was telling me to feel her head! I felt that head and all her hair and knew my heartburn was indeed worth it. 😉
Before I knew it, they told my husband to get in position, as he was to catch our baby girl! For a short second, I didn’t think I could do it, as the ring of fire indeed came (really only at the top if I’m being honest) but as soon as her head was out, it was over! My sweet husband caught our baby and brought her to me where I felt such sweet sweet relief, success, and joy. I also thought in my head “whoa, she’s bigger than I expected!”
The pushing stage didn’t seem long to me, maybe an hour, however it was 3 hours of pushing. When they pulled me up off the birthing stool, I had loss more blood than average, so I laid down with my beautiful girl admiring her as we waited for the after birth and another midwife controlled my bleeding. My baby girl came out ready to nurse, and I was so happy to have that time to bond with her.
After the golden hour, we prepared to burn the umbilical cord ( FYI, her cord stump came off 3 days later because of this!) and then the newborn exam was given. My hubs was able to weight her and she was 9 pounds and 1 ounce! She was a lengthy girl as well, coming in at 21.25 inches! My labor total was 20 hours and it got me one of God’s greatest gifts to a husband and wife, for which I am thankful and would go through again and again. I am so thankful for my midwifery team who has been with me since the very beginning, loving me and all my quirks (and 100s of questions!) I truly know if they did not support and pray for me like they did, I wouldn’t have made it through.
A year later, as I write this, I can tell you I am elated, blessed, and honored for this opportunity. Birth is a beautiful, and sacred space that I am truly thankful for. This is my first time sharing any of these pictures and I can tell you, this is a lot for me. I only let a few people into my birth space, and now I’ve shared it with you. My prayer is that every woman who reads this knows they’re in power of the birth they want. Things won’t go as planned, but you can choose providers who you trust and won’t’ bully you into anything you don’t want last minute.
Also, special shout out to my husband who never left my side during the entire labor. He only left me twice to use the restroom, but always left someone else in charge. I am so thankful to raise kids with this man.
Be good,
Sydney
